The anxiety beast is running rampant through our house right now. With 3 weeks and one hour of school in front of my boys, there is a complete sense of the unknown in front of us. Jake feels it. Tate feels it. I feel it…both mine and theirs.
I remember being in a state of immense joy when school was almost over for the summer. No more teachers, no more books…no more principal’s dirty looks….and all that jazz. Except for my kids. The end of the school year means change. And change, well, change means anxiety. Lots of it.
Tate has several little transitions to get through as we approach summer. First, his teacher is out of school right now after a medical procedure. She returns next week. He has her for 2 weeks, then, and then has a week break, and then starts up ESY part-time. He also will have ABA in the afternoons…and most likely a new therapist on weekday mornings to fill the session times that his afternoon therapists cannot manage. He’s been sleeping like a baby…like a newborn baby. Up a lot, whining, crying…it’s been exhausting.
As the school year winds down, items are coming off of walls, expected wall adornments are put away for the summer, and everywhere one walks, there’s a sense of moving on, of routine change and the like. Tate has been scripting about his aide “breaking” his schedule. Turns out, she was helping to clear some of the posters and his visual schedule ripped. *sigh* (She put it back together…thankfully she knows how much he relies on it!!)
Jake is having the most anxiety about his teacher for fourth grade. He keeps asking his third grade teacher to be his fourth grade one. While sweet, it shows how anxious he is about the change. Thankfully, though, he will get to meet his new teacher before the end of the year so that we can visit her classroom a few times over the summer. He keeps asking what happens next. I can only go over the next few weeks so many times before I get short with him and lose my temper. Then I feel guilty…until he asks me, yet again, what comes next.
I am anxious about how the change in routine from school, to summer (for a week), to summer school, to ESY, to day camp, to therapy, to play dates, to random summer activities will go. I am not as rigid as my children, but the changes in routine make me a little nervous, too. I like to know what’s coming…and, well, one never quite knows..especially when children are involved.
So, we’re trying to muddle along over the next couple of weeks…none of which is really a typical week. This week the boys have Friday off for an inservice day. Next Wednesday they have early release. The following Monday is Memorial Day, and the last week they have a full day of school on Monday and our obligatory hour on Tuesday.
Throw in a handful of end-of-the year activities like field trips (for both of my older two boys), a spring music concert for Tate (still not sure if we should go), Jake’s bridging ceremony for Cub Scouts (Webelo’s here we come!!) and we’re all out of whack.
Maybe it’s time I start doing yoga again…I feel my blood pressure rising, my heart rate increasing, and my breathing race as I start to think about all that’s coming our way in the next 4 weeks….eeek!!!